h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

In the neck of the woods of "America" where I come from, shorts is a reference to an item of clothing worn that typically covers from the waist down to above the knees, stopping anywhere along the thigh. When it stops WAY up on the thigh, they are reffered to as "short-shorts". Who likes short-shorts? I like short-shorts, preferrably on a woman- with toasty buns, not "buttocks". Only tai-bo instructors and doctors say "buttocks" but we will gather them up and collectively say something like "nice butt". (Dr.'s note: we also can be "in the hospital" and not "in hospital", the focus here is the fascility itself, not the state of repair). Now these days, them darn kids wear their short pants down below the knees usually oversized and/or baggy. Sometimes I wonder if they are wearing short "pants" or long shorts. It seems to me this is because they intentionally forget the belt so the crotch hangs low hindering attempts at running and offers a full looky-see at their "underwear". On men that would usually be "boxers" or "bun-huggers" but never "shorts". Some of the young gals have been known to wear men's boxers but what a waste of a good pee hole. They also have many, many types and terms for their underwear and that is oh-so-fine with me. Bra's are also women's underwear but not exclusively and are reffered to as "over-the-shoulder-boulder-holders". Now, if you cut the legs off your pants, you will be left with "cut-offs" (and sleeves) and now casual and comfortable can be added to your collection of "shorts". Please keep the frays under control. Thank you and have a nice day, have two nice days.
Researcher 19**52, Orange CA. U.S. of A.